I am a person who always has desired happiness.
I look for in in friendship, relationships, and in life itself. But somehow, I able never able to ever find happiness successfully.
But lately, something in me has clicked, it's as if I have never had a bad, and it is as if nothing can ever go wrong. And I believe that there are various reasons as to why I am so freaking happy these days.
One, would have to be university. I don't know what I would have done if I had to face another year of high school. It is just so juvenile and it is like everyone's goal is to just be mean, spread around gossip all the time. It always used to bother me so much, and I am so very glad I am no longer dealing with that kind of nonsense.
University has also lead to some of the most amazing experiences of my entire life. I have met so many people, and have done so many crazy things that I can hardly even believe it. I have raced around, worked like a maniac, and learned to multi task like a pro. I have made time, fought time, and gave time all to do what I love in my life.
Two would have to be the relationships that I have already made. I don't know if I could possibly be surviving university without some of the friendships that I have maintained over the past few weeks. Some of which I know I will never forget.
Three, would definitely have to be some of the things that I have left behind and moved on from. I don't think that if I hadn't left some of the baggage behind, I wouldn't be where I am today with such joy. You all know about the friendship that went to very wrong for me just a short time ago, well, about a month ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years. And to be honest, it was one of the best things I have ever done in my life.
I think near the end I felt more sorry for him, we weren't on the same level of thinking, and to be honest, I was more comfortable just "being" in the relationship than actually wanted to. Now that I am "free" per say things have already changed. I am able to go through my life now and not be afraid to talk to certain people in fears that someone will get jealous or made. I'm not afraid to be myself anymore because I know that people love me for me, and I no longer have to pretend to be someone I'm not. I was feeling trapped, but now, I am happy, happy to be me, to like who I am, and to want to improve upon things in myself to make myself a better person and to grow even more in myself.
Because you never know what God is planning for your tomorrow.
The fourth and final thing that has made a difference in my life is God. He has showed me that through being me, I can reach other people, he showed me through my prayers to him, some of the choices I have made as late. I am extremely thankful that I have that relationship with God, to help me get through the day, it is an ultimate blessing.
Happiness is hard to find, but once you are there, life never seems better.
That is all.
Westie<3
